Family Travel With a Tween! #TravelforReal #FamilyForward @Loews_Hotels #LoewsRoyalPacific

 

Family Travel with a Tween

Our son is now 12 and as his parents, we are very conscious that there may come a time when he would rather spend his time with friends than his old fogey parents.

One of the single most important tools I use to keep our son interested in hanging with his dads, is to communicate and include him in the decision process. I did not tell him we were going to Universal Orlando this Summer, I asked him if he wanted to go to. That might seem like a small change of words, but to me it is big because it shows my son that we respect him, his feelings, his interests, and want to include him in the decision making process. I never want him to think that he is in charge, but I always want him to think his dads respect him. After all, how else do I explain to him that if you want respect, you have to give respect? I explain it by practicing what I preach.

And once we have included him in decisions, he feels better. It has an effect on his mood. He feels he has some importance and most of all that he is not being treated like a “kid.” Yes, he is still technically a kid, but he is getting old enough where, as his feelings about the world change, we can begin to treat him differently and more adult like. And I communicate that the entire way! I take every opportunity to explain why we include him, that we want to respect him, and that we expect respect in return.

And we are not taking him to Hershey Park or Sesame Place. As much as we old parents will always enjoy those places, we need to be aware of our son’s interests, this way we set ourselves up for success! Even though he is covering his eyes in the picture above, he is still thrilled that he is in the world of Harry Potter, a movie series that he continually enjoys watching.

Family travel helps us continue to bond as a family. It gives us a chance to do new and fun things together, without the distraction of friends, and because of my strict rules, without the distraction of electronics! Also, by traveling together once or twice a year, we are bonding differently each time as all of is are getting older, all of our interests are shifting. My goal is for our interests to shift together, as a family, as much as possible!

Family travel forces us to continue to communicate and respect each other. Our family bond is very strong when we are out of town, we have to rely on each other more than at home, in a kind of us against the world kind of way. Not that we are against the world, but we are in a foreign place and at the minimum know we all “have each others back.”

Additionally, on this coming Family Forward Conference/Trip, we get to work together as a family on various projects:

I communicate beforehand to my son that we will not have park tickets until we are at the conference for a few days because first we have things to do as a family. Last year we worked on art together, saw a live animal demonstration, and also prepared our own lunch as a family. Because my son knew we were not headed to the park the first two days, he was not anxious and trying to rush us. He was relaxed and enjoyed the tasks we all did together. I cannot stress enough how well early communication works for us, letting my son know the agenda in advance makes for wonderful, smooth sailing!

And pictures! Pictures with characters, pictures on rides, pictures of stunning desserts! We have pictures to view for the many years ahead, so that we never forget all the fun we had together! My son and I both post pictures on social media (look for our posts with the hashtag, “#TravelForReal”) to share with family and friends, we love this way to stay in touch with the outside world, while keeping it at a distance so we can enjoy time with just each other!

Lastly, after 12 years of traveling together, we know how to have fun and connect as a family. We listen to each others interests (OK, mostly we listen to the kid’s interests!), we tell jokes, and we discuss shows we all like. We continue to learn how to communicate, we continue to grow in trust and respect for each other, and we especially love eating out three meals a day on vacation!!! (Yes, I have been known to bond quite strongly at breakfast buffets with my son! Don’t judge!)

Loews Royal Pacific Resort  and Family Forward, get ready, we are coming to town for family bonding, fun adventures, amazing pools, and lots of great food!