When my son was a few months old we were told he had a hernia/unclosed hydro seal.
Medically I may not be describing this perfectly, but his scrotum were not fully descended. We made a surgery appointment right away at the advice of his pediatricians, what else could we do? New parents, scared out of our minds for our child’s health.
Luckily surgeons are busy fellows and our operation was not for another month. In that time, his situation seemed to improve, and then go back to unimproved. Finally a few days before the scheduled operation, we felt that everything was where it was supposed to be and we canceled the operation.
It then occurred to me everyone rushed us to make a surgery appointment because surgery is a business, and businesses need customers. Silly me, I thought doctors where there to help us, not to use us to get paid for surgeries that are not 100% necessary. I may be behind the times here, but it was an important lesson that every parent should hear about.
Fast forward a few years. My son has been under observation for having extra veins in his leg. No big deal, we just monitor it. There are far more disturbing venous malformations out there, his seems quite minor in comparison, but it must be watched. Again, we wanted what was best for our son, so our leg doctor (he was monitoring leg length differential based on the extra veins) suggested we check in with a surgeon to see about an operation to remove the extra veins.
During my conversation with the surgeon at the consultation, I noticed he mentioned that he never got the x-rays delivered, but he saw them on-line. I may not be remembering this 100%, all I knew at the time was it felt like I was hearing a fishy story, that the details from the surgeon did not match the details given to me by the doctor sending the x-rays, something didn’t add up. I checked with our venous malformation doctor’s office and they confirmed charts were fedexed to the surgeon. By him claiming he did not get them, or see them, bells went off for me.
The more I thought about the office visit, the more I felt like the surgeon decided he knew the exact situation from doing a visual on my son’s leg. Perhaps his expertise was such so that was enough. But not for me. If you are not going to be truthful, then you risk losing me as a customer. I decided not go forward with the operation, we are talking about my son having a procedure, I can’t continue with that scenario without feeling 100% confident.
Perhaps you have all realized this information before. I did not. I grew up believing that doctors automatically were there to save lives and were 100% altruistic. Silly, I know, but this is what I believed. But hey, I used to think all clergy were perfect too!
So now I question everything. Is this 100% necessary? Having a child has caused my investigative skills to increase, I want to be as informed as humanly possible so I can make the best choices for my son and his health!
Congratulations -you are a mom-this is exactly how every mother feels-tiger protecting her cubs=I agree-question and then question again!
Good for you! You are a great Dad!
I agree 100% that you have to inform yourself before a procedure and not run into it, but you cannot assume all the doctors are like the ones you visited. This surgeon clearly didn’t do his homework and he was probably even thinking about a different patient (yes, it’s possible!!!!!)
I would say it’s a great idea to look for a second opinion in a serious case. Also, when lab results are not good the first best step is to repeat them.
Funny, that same thing happened to my son, only, I felt there was something wrong, and he actually needed more surgery. Last year me son stepped on a knitting needle and it went 6 inches into his foot. They were concerned because the knitting needle stopped in his ankle. After the initial hospitalization, casts, etc. he finally went back to see the damage done to the tendons and ankle bones. The surgeon said he never received the x-rays, and was just going to go by the person that read them, to say everything was fine. Given the amount of pain, and difficulty, and my son’s foot locks up, I would say now, everything is not fine. But, now I have a son that protests and doesn’t want to go through another surgery. If it had been done when it should have been, it would have been done during the healing process. Now, who knows what damage they are going to have to fix.
I am glad you went with your gut instinct as a parent, I wish I could have convinced my son’s surgeon to follow mine.
Right you are! Everyone has to be an advocate for their health and the health of their loved ones. It’s not just about money/business. Do you know the expression; to a man with a hammer, everything is a nail? Doctors and surgeons are often trained in ways that do not look at bigger pictures. A couple of years ago, I almost had 2 cornea transplants for a condition I have that affects my vision, 2 other doctors recommended this surgery. Luckily for me the Dr decided to go on vacation and postpone my surgery. I was badly in need of correction and asked for another Dr in the office to do it and had to go for yet another exam. Fortunately the intern who examined me before the surgeon diagnosed a minor problem that was corrected in the office by two 5 minute laser surgeries. I may need the transplants some day but not then! This was at Johns Hopkins.
Seems to me they forgot to plant $$ signs in the Hippocratic Oath 🙂 Good for you for standing up for what’s right!!!!
Took our daughter to the “Dr’s” last week. She only saw a nurse for a strep test, she was negative. She is still sick today and has missed 5 days of school. Probably wil be an $80 charge for nothing! I will have to take her to urgent care, which sucks even more bc of the holiday.
I think the whole business of health care is a joke.
I remember when I was a kid. Mom took us in, got diagnosis, RX and paid right there(about $6.00 a visit) Done!! No forms, No BS.
Heartbreaking to think no one os out there to help us with this issue.
I am ready to find us an old hippie Dr.