My Son Has 2 Dads

So I am thankful for the show Glee. He watches the show with me and gets to see gay teenagers, and more importantly, he gets to see that while sometimes gay people are not treated nicely, the story line always comes around to the point that gay people should be treated as well as anyone else.

My son is very proud of his family. I sometimes broach the subject with him, how do you feel that you have 2 dads? His response always comes across in a very proud manner, he feels strongly that he has a great family. I am grateful for his daycare/pre-k, they always maintained that all families are different and all families are beautiful.

Now that we are in public school, we are super fortunate to be in NYC in an area made up of all different types of families. 2 dads, 2 moms, single women with kids by adoption or in-vitro, single dads. We have kids adopted from all over the world. We have every shade and nationality represented. It is hard to stand out as different in this type of environment.

And I am grateful that we do not stand out, I feel that is more supportive of my son. In the areas where my various in-laws live, the neighborhoods are more homogeneous. (Do you see the irony with me using that word!). I am not willing to make my son a pioneer as some families have that we know. I am not moving to a suburban area where we would stand out. Quite frankly, I don’t want the extra challenge for myself.

Back to Glee. The gay folks are portrayed as different, not wrong. This is a portrait that I did not have growing up. My son is not growing up with a negative connotation around “gay people” as I did and internalized, just from what I heard in society. That is also why it is interesting that he has managed to learn from other kids that gay means his 2 dads, gay means happy, and gay can also be derogative. He has already heard other kids teasing certain people even in 2nd grade by calling them “gay” which he takes to mean “gross” in that instance. What is wrong with people?

And I tell him he is to always defend his fellow students. Name calling and bullying are unacceptable and that is how we try to teach him. He is a large and fearless kid (yes, my opposite) and I know he can be of help to these friends someday. And it will help him. Because his family is different than most. And some mean types down the road may try to make a point of suggesting to him that is wrong. I hope I am preparing him with the tools today to deal with that discrimination later, because it is up to these wonderful young kids to change the world, to halt, wherever possible, the prejudice, the discrimination, the downright hatred of anything that is “different.”