Tween Body Issues Already!

It started with talk of a uni-brow. If you look really closely you can indeed see a slight amount of light colored hair between my son’s dark eye lashes. And who cares?

Well, someone must have said something to him. As much as he is a big tough guy, he is also a gentle giant, not one to be bullied, but he is also very sensitive. And unfortunately he is affected by other people’s opinions of him. I hope he can grow out of this, it is never our business what anyone else thinks of us, only what we think of ourselves!

Then he started wearing a wool hat over his head pulled down to his eyebrows. I really did not know what to do! Luckily I ran into my BFF and guru, Stacy. She has been a wonderful friend since her daughter and my son were in Kindergarten together 6 years ago. Plus, she has a son 5 years older than mine. She is an amazing resource for all the questions I have about a tween, soon to be teen, son. She has already been through it and I love her opinions about the subject. At the minimum I know I cannot handle things (by silence) the way they were handled when I was growing up.

So I spilled it. And she very simply said, why don’t you get his uni-brow waxed? Why? Because I know nothing about these things and need to network! It seemed simple enough and I couldn’t bear another day of watching him walk around with a hat over the top of his face! His gorgeous face!

Immediately at school pick up I took him to the salon. Tough guy did not want to go in, it was too pink and all. I finally got him in, I cajoled him to the appointment I set up, and within a minute is was over.

I understand I may have to do this again, but I could not see my son suffering with these issues. And these sort of things have come up before, mostly because of his over sensitivity to what other people have to say about him. He doesn’t understand that when he shows a weakness, a certain type of child will pounce on that. I chalk it up to human nature, and it is something we all have to learn how to deal with at one time or another.

What would you have done?

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Comments

  1. 1
    Tracy Robertson says:

    I think you did great. I think all teens and tweens are over sensitive with their body issues and he will grow out of that.

  2. 2
    Joanne Gregory says:

    You did exactly what I would have done! And now he can stop worrying about it.

  3. 3

    That Stacy… she’s a keeper!

  4. 4

    This is tough to handle! I went through this with my son, who just turned 13. I took him in for a haircut and right in front of him, the lady asked me if I wanted to have his brows waxed. I turned her down, but couldn’t help but see that he had noticed. Back in the car he asked me why she said that, which started his self-consciousness about it. He had never even noticed before! I talked with him about his body/his choice, but wanted to emphasize that there is nothing wrong with having a sparse amount of hair there, but since he was now self-conscious about it, offered to tweeze it. I felt bad about it, but ultimately it is their choice, and if it makes them self-conscious, why not? It is better than them obsessing over it and feeling bad about themselves.

  5. 5

    Just a thought – you might want to try threading next time – less painful & I’ve seen a lot of men having it done where I go. Mitch, you did exactly the right thing – I’m sure he feels less self-conscious now.

  6. 6

    Good job, dad! If he feels weird about going to a girlie salon, take him to one of the more male-oriented ones, like Floyd’s. Or, just zap him between the eyes with some trimmers. Vooot. Done.

  7. 7

    Oh wow, can you imagine having a girl, they’re very sensitive about everything. My daughter went through the drama queen stage from ages 9-11. She has gotten more comfortable with herself especially with boys liking her now at 13

    sibabe64 at ptd dot net

  8. 8
    Nannypanpan says:

    Some kids in my sons kindergarten class told him he had crazy hair …his hair had stuck up in a spot cause he had been wearing a hat earlier. I reassured him that it was cause he has long…not too long, but not razor cut hair like most boys and not to worry about it. It happened awhile ago and he still worries about his hair. I know the kids weren’t trying to be mean…but it’s hard when your kid is sensitive and I’ve taught him not to make fun of others for the way they look or what they wear…so I think he was surprised someone would say it to him. I think you did the right thing…it was minor and it boosted your sons self esteem. You might want to see if any of the barber type shops do it… So he doesn’t worry about it being done in a salon…and that other guys get it done too so he doesn’t think it’s just him

  9. 9

    I would have done the same thing. This situation happened to my granddaughter who is eleven. She came home from school and immediately had to have something done about her unibrow. Kids can be so cruel to other kids and it is frightening now with all of the social media where they can also bully.

  10. 10

    I’m not sure I would have considered waxing. I have a 16 year old daughter & she does have issues with that. She plucks the stray hairs. My son is 8 and a red head, his eyebrows are almost white they are so blonde, so I’m betting this won’t be an issue with him. (thank goodness!)

  11. 11
    Jennifer Shelton says:

    Oh I am dreading the day that either of my children get there! Being a teenager is so hard

  12. 12
    Linda Manns Linneman says:

    I really think you did the right thing. I hope he is feeling better about his eyebrows

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